Post by Rowe Rickenbacker
when she comes to have the "actual" conversation it is the second
time for her so she "skips" the (to her) unimportant parts of the
conversation leaving us bewildered as to what she is saying. And of
course then to ask her to REPEAT it is very aggravating to her. Now
that we(us and her) have realized this she is finding conversation
much easier to enter and enjoy. She is also talking to US as if it is
for the first time.The thought process is happening at the same time
as the conversation if that makes sense. So that when the
conversation doesn't go according the one she had "by herself" she is
not disappointed and can cope with it going in another direction...
I used to be similar... and to a certain extent still am since I do work
the conversation out to work out the most likely answers and outcomes
etc, so really I am not recieving a general answer as much as one of a
small selection I have concluded in my head.
Anyway... when I don't do this, or at least when I have a conversation
in "real time" I often have the most annoying stutter, since I can't
really keep up, and I start leaving things out and everyone gets
confused, but if I try to focus I can keep it all in. Can't really get
rid of the stutter though, especially in emotional or complicated things
that I don't fully understand.
My daughter doesn't stutter. She has no speech impediment but maybe because
she does tend to "sit out" of long and detailed conversation. Once she has
lost the plot( of the conversation that is<G>) she tends to not get invovled
till it comes around to something she can grab onto and interact about.
The problem as I see it with already preconcieved ideas of what the response
is going to be is that does she hear the "other" response or not.I will have
to ask when I see her next. Its the weekend and she is usually out till
Sunday night( oh to be young again).
Post by Rowe Rickenbacker
People are very patient, though - and when I had a recent job interview
for a warehouse job in a local supermarket, the person interviewing me
was very understanding and supportive since she saw that I was trying to
say things that meant a lot to me, but that there was a bit of a barrier
in the way. That is a really fantastic thing when you have problems
because of Autism, since you actually have a problem that people can
*see* when they talk to you, so you can hide all of the other problems
behind that and so really they just think I'm a bit shy with a stutter.
I too stutter but not all the time. Before my husband and I married we had a
terrible fight one night(don't ask me what it was about.That is truly lost
in the mists of time.....) suddenly I couldnt speak a word. Not one word. I
went to the doctor and found out that my tracheal valve had stuck open and
that is why I couldn't speak.I was on sedatives for a week or two to reduce
my "need" to communicate and let it rest. After a few days speech came back
but I stuttered for about two weeks after.
Now if I get over emotional(thank goodness those days are few and far
between now) it happens again. I can feel it happen. My tongue drops to the
floor of my mouth and will not budge. When it happens I no longer try to
speak, I just rest it and speech comes back in a few hours and now only very
occassionally do I stutter after it.
But I learned a lot about what it is like to stutter in that two weeks. I
HATED it. People kept trying to preemt what I was saying which just made it
worse as I would have to try to say "no" when they got it wrong. No has to
be the hardest word to say if you stutter. I also found some to be cruel and
try to make your stutter worse just so they got a laugh.
I knew a boy once who had a terrible stutter when he had to speak to anyone
outside his family. Except me. This was before I had any stutter problems
myself and only ,I feel, because I let him finish his own sentence when I
spoke to him.He then didn't stutter anymore when he spoke to me.
BTW Did you know that you don't stutter if you whisper? I find this very
strange.But helpful in letting my family know that I am having "one of
Another point on stuttering. My primary school pricipal had a terrible time
with speech problems. But he was a brilliant man. When I was in grade 2 he
caught my teacher forcing me to write with my right hand and had made me sit
on my left( I am lefthanded in case you couldn't guess;))
He told her to never do it again. He then spent a few weeks with me after
school teaching me to write without the obvious lefthand backward writing
technique(of which I am very grateful to him for to this day as many who
have known me for years are stunned when they suddenly realize I am left
handed).He told me that he was naturally left handed but that when he was
young he had been forced to learn to use his right hand. He was convinced
that is what caused his stutter. He was thinking at normal rate but for some
reason couldn't get the words to come out at the same speed that he was
thinking them. The forced use of his right hand had somehow casued his brian
to slow this function down.
I saw on a doco once that when we are born our brain has many paths that the
electronic messages pass through to get our body to "do" the thing we want
it to do. Like when you watch a baby trying to reach out and grab a toy. At
first they miss all the time and then slowly they get closer and closer till
they can actually grab it. During this process the brain is sending these
electronic messages down these paths till it finds the right one to do the
job. Then all the other paths die off till only the one needed to perform
that task is left. By focing my principal to change the "learned " path of
his left hand brain function he lost the ability to speak as fast as he
How sad that we were ever so backward as a people in thinking that all
people should act the same.
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